I’m usually pretty decisive about what I write, but I’m not sure if I like this better shorter or longer. So here’s both
This effectively eliminates any phrasing that could be construed as gender-based stereotyping
They met in a little café downtown
Under the peeling purple letters that say
Noise.
She rode the freight train to get there but he
Walked there through the fog cut with greyish-white
Snow.
He held the door for her, but she simply
Smiled, for her lips were frozen together –
Thanks.
She sat alone at a splattered table
He wanted to join her but he was too
Shy.
The end… do lament for this poor boy who
Never goes anywhere, he loves to be
Safe.
Unless…
V2
They met at a little café
under peeling letters that say
noise
She caught the last train there
he walked through the blowing grey
ash
He held the door open
she smiled, her lips frozen
shut
He sat alone at a table
wanting to join him, she was too
shy
The end of the lament says
she never goes nowhere, loves being
safe
Thank you